Scene 1: In the Beginning...
[Lights up on business meeting around a table. Neil, Al, Lou, Fifi, and Matthew are seated and relaxed]
AL So while Neil, here, was walking down the hall carrying metastable isotopes, I waxed the floor to a near frictionless surface. Whoa, Nelly! He surfed downed the hall pretty far before he fell and the isotopes decided that they'd be happier in a different energy state. The explosion blew out most of the research wing.
NEIL Ha. Ha. Very funny.
LOU Actually, yes, it is.
FIFI Lou, be nice. Now, Neil, you must understand that if you leave yourself open, Al won't hesitate to pull a practical joke in order to get back at you.
NEIL Get back at me for what?
AL Let's see. How about the time-release dye in my shower. That would be a good start.
FIFI Oh, and did you have to chose a color like green. I mean really, Neil, if you're going to dye Al a color, couldn't you have at least chosen an interesting color like magenta or fuscia? Not green.
NEIL Lou, you saw the reaction sequences I had to arrange for the time release effect in the dye. Do you think I was worried about what color it turned after it dried on him?
LOU I have to admit the green was pretty hideous, but I think, Madame Fifi, that that was rather the point.
FIFI I see no reason for creating anything that is not fashion coordinated. It's thoughts like these on your parts that force us all to live in this drab, clashing place full of all the wrong color combinations to make people queasy.
[Matthew receives a page]
MATTHEW Sorry guys. I'll be back in a minute, it's the boss.
FIFI Is that not just like Matthew? Always running off to another more important meeting.
AL Yeah. He doesn't actually do anything, does he?
NEIL Well, he does manage us. . .
LOU Constrain us. Isn't that what you mean, Neil?
NEIL Yeah, constrain us. He keeps us in our places and lets us all know what toys we can play with.
FIFI Matthew - Manager Extraordinaire.
[Everyone Laughs. Fade to Black. Lights up on other part of the stage with God. Matthew enters.]
MATTHEW God, you beeped me?
GOD Yes, I have a job for you. An important thing whose time has come.
MATTHEW What can we do?
GOD I want you to create Chicken and Egg.
MATTHEW Chicken and Egg...?
GOD They must be self-sustaining, with meaning, and they must be the same but different. Do you understand?
MATTHEW Well, uhm... not really. Self-sustaining I understand. I mean, if they're immortal like us then they'll just have to be able to live on their own and that shouldn't be hard to arrange.
GOD They must be mortal beings, Matthew.
MATTHEW Right then, "mortal but self-sustaining." I'm sure the team can handle that kind of a challenge. The "with meaning" part I think I might be able to figure out. Now, about the "same but different" thing. I'm lost on that one.
GOD That is all right, Matthew. You will understand in time.
MATTHEW [aside]I hate it when he does that.
GOD Good! You have six days.
MATTHEW Six?!! Only six days?
GOD That is all.
MATTHEW Six days, right then, we'd better get to work. I mean, there's the opening ceremonies to plan, the Cosmological parties to organize... oh. And a Chicken/Egg to create.
[fade Blackout. Light up on original table scene with Neil, Al, Lou, and Fifi]
NEIL . . . completely useless.
AL How can you even think that electro-weak interactions aren't interesting, have you ever looked at the field particles involved? Fifi, do you know what he is saying? Do you know?
FIFI Well I know that red goes well with navy.
MATTHEW Yes, red goes very well with navy. However, we have a mission.
AL A mission?
MATTHEW Yes, a mission from God. We are to create Chicken and Egg. They are to be self-sustaining, with meaning, and they are to be the same, but different.
AL Self-sustaining, you mean like separate from us. On their own. An entirely new cosmos, with its own laws, actions, reactions, interactions, iterations...
NEIL "Self-sustaining, with meaning, same but different." Exactly what does he mean?
MATTHEW Well... I'm not sure, but he isn't the kind of god you can bargain with for more information now is he?
FIFI An entirely new universe with color coordination and an infinite variety of hues and saturation, different textures and shading and composition... oh, this will be the most fashionable cosmos to live in, ever!
LOU How self-sustaining? 'Cause that means separate from us, as far as you know, and that means that once we set this thing in motion we aren't going to be able to revamp it, only modify it.
MATTHEW I trust in all of your judgments so make it as free and non-deterministic as necessary, but people, people... we have six days.
NEIL Just six days, that'll never do. We need more time.
AL Why, the field theory alone could take me all year to build up.
FIFI And just how many fashion statements do you intend me to be able to make in six days? I mean how many hues can you make fadge in a week?
MATTHEW Six days are all we have, and I don't see God slowing time down too much for us this go 'round. Al, I want you working on the energy interactions now; we need a framework and we need it yesterday.
AL Yesterday can be arranged.
MATTHEW Al, He doesn't like it when you do that. He knows and he'll be counting the days. So just get it to me quickly. OK? You've got all day; I want your report by tomorrow morning. [Al exits to begin work] Neil, we'll need a series of interactions that can be maintained and made self-sustaining. Brush up today and you'll have all of tomorrow to work on it. I'll bring you Al's report in the morning. Lou, we need self-sustaining lifeforms, get to work on it. Fifi, look into how a Chicken/Egg can have meaning. What I'm looking for here is a more complex view of the soul. To work, team, for there's a world of work to do!
[Blackout. End of Scene 1]